God and the YMCA

Ben and I were in the habit of attending weekly Mass prior to my trip to China. That came to a halt when we returned.  Not for lack of faith –mind you, I think I have uttered more prayers in the past month than the whole year prior.  I’m pretty sure the Lord understood, despite the whole “keep holy the Sabbath” thing.  I kept trying to picture Evan in Church, sitting quietly, watching something he didn’t understand and couldn’t hear.  I thought back to the Masses of my youth.  I liked to sing the songs and I tried to listen to the message.  If I cancel all of that out, it becomes one interminable hour of watching a guy in a long robe barely move.  

So, last Sunday I decided Evan was finally ready to see his first Mass.  Someone suggested the “baby room,” but I didn’t want to give him the feeling that he would be able to go to Church and make noise or act out.  I got the boys ready and we drove to Church.  We parked the car and walked into Church.  I stopped at the entry and made the sign of the cross with Holy Water on Evan’s head. “Can’t hurt,” I thought.  Seconds later, Evan blew out a devotional candle as we passed. 

I opted for a seat towards the back in case we needed to make a quick retreat.  As we slid into the pew, Evan let out a few noises which made everyone look at him.  Sheepishly, I said, “We are going to try this today, but if he becomes disruptive, we will leave.”  Naturally, everyone responded graciously and said, “Oh, no problem at all!”   I thought, “You say that, now.”

I knelt for a simple beginning prayer, “Ok God, here goes nothing….”  And then I gulped and sat down.  Surprisingly, Evan was mostly good.  I had to take him to the restroom, and I reminded him to be quiet a couple of times.  He pretended to read the Mass Book.  He lay across my lap. Mostly, he looked really, really bored.

But then, close to the end of the Mass, Evan perked up.   I looked at Evan, sitting ramrod straight with his eyes sharply focused on the altar. He looked very, very interested.  I looked from Evan’s face and then back to the altar.  Oh, no!  How could I have not seen this coming???!  Evan was watching the man in the robes prepare SNACKS.  Okay, to the rest of the Catholics this was the most Holy part of the Mass and that was the body and blood of Christ…but not to Evan.  He was quite sure we had finally gotten to the good part, and he was licking his lips. 

I leaned to Ben and I whispered, “When we walk down to the altar, I want you to go behind us.  I don’t want Evan to see you taking Holy Communion.” 

“Why Mommy?”

“Just do it, Ben.  He’s not going to understand why he can’t have some.” 

We got in line for the Holy Eucharist.  I held Evan’s hand and we advanced slowly.  There was a gentleman – a layperson – offering Communion in our line.  I stood in front of him, hands out, and responded, “Amen.”  Then I grabbed Evan’s hand and yanked him away just as he was reaching for the Chalice with both hands and stretching his neck to try to get a whiff of Jesus himself.  Evan was NOT HAPPY. 

Back in the pew, Evan gestured wildly at me.  It went something like this: Arms waving towards the altar - finger jabbing the air at me – then, the sign for eating – then he made a small circle with his fingers – then arms wave around angrily again.  Then, Evan crawled under the pew, wrapped his arms around his bent knees and stewed.  I tried to look serene and pious as I turned my eyes to the heavens to avoid the stares of the folks around me.  I said a quick prayer and sat down. 

Luckily, my Church serves donuts and juice after Mass, so Evan forgave me and God for depriving him earlier.  We exited and I exhaled.   

That was the beginning of last week.  Monday, I returned to work and the boys went to the YMCA summer camp.  I watched my phone obsessively, and though Evan didn’t get high marks in behavior – I only got one phone call.    The child care counselors were wonderful with both children, and I couldn’t thank them enough for working with us. 

It was a very busy week getting my new classroom ready and also getting Evan and Ben registered in their new school.  The Principal of Evan’s school, also an adoptive Mom, has been amazing to us.  She called an emergency meeting with the appropriate people to have everyone on deck ready to begin working with Evan.  I was able to allow Evan to meet the interpreter, speech pathologist, deaf/hard of hearing teacher and audiologist he will be working with.  This is in addition to having a fabulous Kindergarten teacher.  Ben met his new 4^th grade teacher, Mr. Miller.  He is a very nice man and has a stellar reputation as a teacher.  I think it will be great for Ben to have a male teacher since we don’t have too much “guy time” around here. 

The kids start school on Monday.  As of Friday, their bus still wasn’t arranged. After multiple calls, I was instructed to call back 6:00 a.m. MONDAY morning.  The suspense is killing me.  Oh, and tomorrow we will attempt Mass again.  Say a prayer for usJ.